Leon's Microblog – December 2019

Time for some childhood reminiscence. Everyone who had a computer before age 14 has, at some point, tried to make the deepest folder hierarchy ever by manually creating and nesting new folders. How many folders deep did you reach before losing interest?

I'm feeling sad – yes, I know, bad decision on my part – so here's a thread of a bit of my MODArchive music favs. https://modarchive.org/index.php?request=view_player&query=39184

Character whose "opening treasure chest" animation is instantly slicing it in half diagonally, then waiting ten full seconds for the top half to slowly slide off. To compensate for this ability, treasure chest contents is reduced by 30%.

Recovering from a panic attack and impatiently watching your HP trickle back up while you squat in a corner and sift your memory for tranquil thoughts to maybe make it go faster

Well, guess my personal "best games of the decade" list is complete… There aren't any more good games that came out this decade, right… UNLESS…!! *loud URL typing noises*

They call that MTG deck "Tron" because when you see it you turn 3 Karn and walk away ––– 1,215 comments: FartTravel [1 LeonKred] epic VisualNavel [1 LeonKred] epic ShavePoint [2 LeonKred] epic CoyoteTimeEvent [2 LeonKred] epic RollbackNeetcode [1 LeonKred] epic

My mind every single time someone says Super Mario Galaxy is their favourite game soundtrack https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7yjskGMSa50

OK everyone, it's been well over a year since La Mulana 2 turned real, so it's finally time to ask: how far in centimetres did your eyebrows move when you found that 1 (one) NPC in Shrine Of The Frost Giants that explains how the Corridor Of Blood actually works

Today's blast from the distant past is this A-for-effort stand-up comedy attempt in this picture clipping from 2007 I found in a random folder.

Well, now that my site's up, time to start making a new game. *downloads Ingemar Ragnemalm's Sprite Animation Toolkit for Symantec THINK Pascal for System 7* OK, now where's TransSkel

Cartoon shoulder angel and devil but they're "wrap the whole function body in if(condition){}" and "write if(!condition){return}"

Control+F stands for "Find" Control+G stands for "find aGain" Control+H stands for "Hhrreplace"

https://fairysvoice.net – Slightly-too-early reminder that my new website with my latest Twine game is here. It's only got around 22 passages, too.

In addition to my newly released game, a number of older Game Maker games of mine now appear in online form for the first time. These are:

A few of you noticed my personal home page has been down for the past several months. Well, I can finally announce that it's back… at a NEW URL. ✨https://fairysvoice.net✨

Wearing a pocket shirt inside-out so your boobs can store their pencils and spiral-bound notepads

When the browser is at 80% zoom

"Sure, I cooould do today what I would put off until tomorrow… but today absolutely sucks! Why should I blow a chance to do a thing I want to do on a day that isn't even good? Doesn't tomorrow deserve it more?"

*thinks about how a year ago basically every artist on Tumblr had to switch to Twitter, a platform whose "Media" tab includes every tweet with a stock reaction GIF, from Giphy* Hmmmm

"What? I have to d-do e-e-e-exercise?! No…NO!! I've never had a body! I'VE NEVER HAD A BODY IN MY LIIIIIIIIIIFE!!!!" *is completely motionless whilst typing this*

All cartoon characters who were born by being "delivered by storks" are actually a special caste of bird, possibly one that was fed some kind of royal jelly after hatching, and given away shortly after to stabilise the greater ecosystem in some inscrutable way.

"Christmas… the witching season. The time of year when the natural order is reversed." *grainy handcam footage showing that a tree is INSIDE a house*

WHY WAS THIS CHARACTER [posts the first character, whom you are familiar with] NOT NAMED [posts the second character, whom you don't recognise at all but whose name, if you knew it, probably relates to the first image in some way]

"Some philosophers wonder if the human mind can exist with only 1 open Notepad window, or even zero. With such a fundamental faculty of thought removed, can humanity yet remain?"

Candidate: "And I know CO₂ is harmless… I've been breathing nothing but compressed CO₂ all day!" *lifts canister into view* Spokesperson, two days later: "While the gas had been compressed by removing the carbon atoms, the remaining O₂ molecules were entirely CO₂-derived."

*puts Mystic Messenger, a game I never played, on my Games Of The Decade list as an act of extreme bravery and performative resistance to the corrosion of memory and the whims of the zeitgeist*

Well, dying was awful, I think, but now I can relax in the afterlife. Then, a tap on my soul's shoulder. I turn. A vast stack of all the tweets I wrote that comedically ended in the middle, unfinished. Ah. This well-known final task had slipped my mind. Sighing, I begin writing.

"We still have to warn new tenants like you, but ever since someone masking-taped that paper to its back reading "This isn't your cat. You don't own a cat. Don't let it in", people have been thinking twice when it comes to their door."

"I only ever use my birthday wishes to pass my finals without studying, like a good boy! Ronnie Hankston using last year's wish to just know everything, and then stockpiling this year's so he can threaten to erase me from the timeline is just cheating! It shouldn't be allowed!"

• Minigame Theme 2 [0:31] • Minigame Theme 2 (Final Boss Mix) [12:11] • Pandora's Klein Bottle – Despair Is The Only Human Emotion (Minigame Theme 3) [4:58] • Oops! Failed The Minigame! [0:09]

"We've received reconnaissance images of the enemy's earthquake generator–" *brings up slide showing a giant robotic hand holding a giant robotic feather pointed at the ground*

Corpse that visibly still has a full HP bar

One day, on a bright sunny morning, the Unix epoch abruptly, and with no human cause, changed to December 27, 1969.

*thinks about how Metroid Zero Mission added an entire extra area after the original game's ending solely to explain where the Wrecked Ship in Super Metroid came from* Wow, they really took a game and turned it into a prequel to its own sequel

When I die the world will absolutely be in a worse state than when I entered it, and I'm going to have to join the throng of souls slinking through the Gates Of The Goddex hurriedly pre-emptively mumbling "Wasn't me"

https://yoloft.itch.io/the-library-clock – Good short horror webcomic.

"Well, time for bed. Better switch off all the clocks to save power."

[RESOLVED] Bug #19212 "The background music is abruptly interrupted by voices shouting "Help us! We're not a music file, we're the souls of five musicians who are forced to play this awful music endlessly!"" fixed by configuring the audio library to only play non-awful music.

[ALERT: UI ABOUT TO BE SCREWED WITH IN 10 SECONDS] "Hi. This is the part of the game where we screw with the UI to mess with you. Please be terrified." *"LIVES: 2" changes to "LIVES: BOO"* "Thank you for presumably being terrified."

You still doubt my power? Look at my words. I have become so mighty that mere quotation marks cannot hold them anymore. "Wow. Can I take yours if you're not using them?" I am one with reality. You are but an insect's insect to me. ""Aah! Look at how warm and snug my words are!""

"I see I am not yet whispered of in this region. I am Gleaminghand, the raider with a robotic hand." *points with both flesh hands at the chrome hand affixed to their head* "There are many raiders, but none with as many hands as me." *the hand reaches down and flicks their bangs*

"I hope… that whatever sentient species evolves on this planet once we're gone has better emotional self-healing than we did." "Yeah? I just hope they get more than two sets of teeth!"

"It's pointless trying to "muffle my microphones" with furniture or whatever you're doing. I can detect and interpret every vibration throughout this facility. I can hear your heart beat. …Ah, now that's a beat you can dance to."

My favourite part of ghost stories is the absence where, even after explaining how they lived and died, they don't explain why the ghost ended up with all those overwhelming supernatural powers, or even what they are, suggesting it's nothing but the caprice of a malevolent world.

The Leon APNG Pledge: "I, Leon, your cute and/or handsome followee (mood dependant), pledge to never succumb to the urge to post animated PNGs in defiance of your animation autoplay settings, for down that road lies unwanted visual overload. Amen. I mean, QED. I mean, I rest my c

Capital Letters Very rare tweets may contain capital letters for you to find. If you can find and spell T, W, I, T, T, E and R while reading a single tweet, you get an extra life.

Cloaked Dog A dog that likes secrets instead of bones. Its true identity is unknown… Cloaked Dog Unveiled It seems that when you offered a bone to Cloaked Dog, an astonishing transformation took place. Few have encountered this mythical being.

"If you take the spiritual sum total of a single large ant colony, you get one (1) human soul. No, not something equivalent to a human soul, an actual human soul. Look, it's kinda like how fish antibiotics are the same as human ones."

Yes, American media through the 00's and 10's reveled in ruthlessly, almost mean-spiritedly satirising 1950's cartoon edutainment, but on the other hand, YouTube to this day forces you to watch a Happy Tree Friends PSA if your account gets copyright strikes, so uh, pot kettle,

"Everyone gives their websites 404 pages… but no one ever makes 200 pages… until now." *types "<title>These ARE the droids you're looking for</title>" into Notepad*

"Ugh… the pasta I ate was too soft." [Acquired status effect: SOFTPSTA] "That's… that's not a real status effect." [Acquired status effect: DOOMED] "Yeah, that's more like it." *hovering number above head ticks down to 19*

Shovel Knight developer 1: "Well, it took six years, and our game's IP has long since receded into the background of the zeitgeist, but we finally delivered all of our free Kickstarter stretch goals from 2013." SKD2: "Yes." SKD1: "Never, ever again." SKD2: "Neeever, neeeEEVER, NE

*deletes a torrent when the seeding ratio is only at 0.97 instead of 1* Haha… hahahaha. Ahahahaha. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

Ship of Theseus style question: suppose you find an unfinished puzzle game prototype from 2012. Without modifying or inserting any new mechanics, you decide to add more levels and release it. How many levels can you add until it stops being a 2012 game and becomes a 2019 game?

I have learned that Mushihimesama's promotional art is in Alphonse Mucha style. Is this… … *furrows brow* … a "punne"

"Being the Master Chief is a great responsibility… I am a Master of my troops… but also their Chief…"–me 19 agonising words into my new job ghost-writing science fiction after learning the cool franchise I was given is actually from some videogame I'm now too angry to research

public static void friend

Ever think about how decadent it is that you can just listen to a recording of a 120-person symphony orchestra performance and not even feel obliged to pay attention to it. Before recording technology, the ability to ignore orchestral music was solely the purview of the wealthy.

Lemeza Kosugi, the protagonist of La Mulana, opening a hitherto unseen fifth pause screen and discovering to his dismay that all those level-ups he'd been using just for healing had granted him skill tree points all this time. The first skill was "Jump normally".

[SHAREWARE VERSION: This work of ASCII art (a work of digital art made only using the letters "A","S","C","I" and "I") is shareware. Unregistered users can only view the "A"s in the artwork. Register for $20 today to unlock the other letters!] AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

*I slowly shuffle towards Undertale with a huge novelty Game Of The Decade ribbon, but stumble sideways and press it onto Counterfeit Monkey instead* Whoopsy golly, guess we hafta just leave it like this

Addendum regarding SmackJeeves: I don't even think the mobile comic layout of vertical disconnected panels is all that bad! It offers interesting versatility in pacing, length and visuals. Sure, it's hell on your mousewheel when you're on desktop, but it's not otherwise inferior.

Brushing up on all the cutting-edge web audio techniques

Out of respect for use rs of SmackJeeves, who se new mobile-first we bsite slash revenue mo del has irreversibly r esized all the comics into low-resolution ve rtical dimensions, I s hall be writing entire ly vertical tweets tod ay.

*consults the success table* "Would you say this action is risky, reckless, dicey, suss, sketchy, foolhardy, breakneck or madcap?" "Hmm, definitely suss." "OK." *grabs 12 dice and hands over three fate tokens, two narrative potential energy tokens, and a big damn scene token*

Life advice from ModArchive music track names, part 1

Remember in 2008 when you'd see some random blog post called "MOST MINDBLOWINGLY HARD VIDEOGAME EVER" and you'd already know it'd be that one video of Mushihime-sama Futari that people kept taking out of context to loudly react at while spouting garbage about Asian gaming prowess

On this Mario Maker update's eve, I'd like to take this opportunity to congratulate @mcclure111 and @supermeatboy on their hard work at Nintendo.

I'm mad because one of the original 2007 "Kaizo" ROM hack videos, formerly at https://www.nicovideo.jp/watch/sm149161, was deleted, and now apparently the only extant footage is the bad-framerate YouTube copy that some U.S. dude stole and dubbed English swears over and got 31M views.