Leon's Microblog – November 2020

I have a playlist of my favourite HVSC SIDs and a playlist of my favourite MODArchive MODs, and whenever I listen to the former playlist I think "wow, this is beautiful" every time, and whenever I listen to the latter playlist I think "oh Jesus Christ it's THIS song" every time.
and I think it reveals what intuitions game designers have about "HP", where it's analogous with raw body mass, characters being bags of flesh that are "emptied" by hits and shots and "filled" by food. HP as this abstraction of "health" clumsily forced back into the concrete.
One of the more nonsensical yet telling fatphobic game tropes is this idea that fat characters have more HP – not more defense, more HP – compared to characters with "normal" builds. Pokémon does this, Team Fortress 2 does this, large swathes of beat-em-ups do this,
Damn… can't believe the events of Enviro-Bear 2000 canonically happened 20 years ago…
Messed up. Messed up. *shakes head* Messed up. *messed up* Shakes head.
I've been looking deep into myself, and I've come to the conclusion that "Two pair! The double katanas of Poker hands." was the funniest thing I've ever tweeted that got zero likes and RTs. That's OK. Something has to take that honour.
Easily my favourite unstated implication in Ano2 is the possibility, introduced in the lategame, that Nova wasn't exactly created by the Center, but might have been, very literally, born again.
Everyone will some day be forgotten, but it doesn't have to happen that the final person to forget you is yourself, still alive.
Based on a couple of developer comments, 'ne 2 is simply a straightforward allegory for outgrowing an evangelical childhood rather than specifically a commentary on the medium (yes, even given the inclusion of "metacoins", collectable coins literally named after Metacritic).
To me, though, it seems obvious 'dyne 2's story isn't addressing those games, or the violence/love dichotomy they deal in (and the earlygame doesn't really cast your actions as being motivated by "love" so much as service, an obligation to a cause).
One other Anodyne 2 thing… I've seen people interpret it as a deconstruction of "love RPGs" like Moon or Undertale, in that its earlygame is about helping/"solving" NPCs in a Chulip-like fashion, but the lategame examines the controlling/indoctrinating motives behind it…
Hello. I turned 34 years old very recently. I hope over the next year I become myself a little more and more. I also vow to get out the next Harlowe (Twine 2 story format) release within these next two weeks… without fail! Thanks and good day.
The most important and relatable character design decision Andrew Hussie ever made was deciding that trolls have massive dark bags under their eyes constantly.
*gulps down an entire glass of water, then spit-takes with a completely empty mouth* HEY, THIS ACT HAS NO CREDITS?? You finish the end cutscene and it just… goes back to the title?! Did they just… FORGET to put them in? Who the HELL made this game?? Who are they hiding?! Who ar
Me (represented by the eggblob from the puzzle game Petal Crash on the left) every single time I encounter an NPC in Hiveswap Act 2 (represented by the fiendkin from the same puzzle game on the right)
Harvester is a game where Western social undercurrents of violence, cruelty, inequality and hypocrisy are shockingly laid bare by townsfolk representing various facets of society, who slowly indoctrinate the player until they accept that society really desires murder, rewards it.
I'm REALLY glad I watched footage of Harvester (1996 point-and-click) before playing Hiveswap Act 2 (2020 point-and-click) because the final chapter in this basically retroactively turns the entire game into Harvester.
These are all problems that could be solved by writing multiple valid routes through each testimony (instead of just the same structure Phoenix Wright used 19 years ago) or just more solid playtesting. Anyway, I recommend mashing the tiny question-mark hint button liberally here.
Note for the wary: this game has an Ace Attorney minigame in it, and while the character writing in it is surprisingly good, it suffers from the standard Ace Attorney puzzle problems: evidence that can be used too early, testimony with multiple apparent contradictions, the usual.
I'll shout out this song and its remixes. You spend half the Act listening to them, and they nail the sensation of being surrounded by nice commuters who were raised to be utterly deranged, and know it, and are ashamed of it, and are also literal children. https://homestuck.bandcamp.com/track/ticket-to-ride-rusty
If you're the sort of person who really, REALLY loves animated fighting game backgrounds while also REALLY never once having played one, let me say that Hiveswap Act 2 has a lot to offer.
I will say, though, that the bog-standard point-and-click narrator is still capable of genre-typical humour, such as this "emergent joke" across both playable characters.
This one, though, has over thirty onscreen characters, and thus the narrator character's sad demise, while still very noticeable and jarring, is nonetheless soon forgotten about.
That being said, though… I actually think this isn't that big of a wound on this game. ACT 1, as you know, had a total of 3 onscreen characters, so the narrator in that one really had to carry the whole game on its shoulders, and the bulk of text was item interactions.
I've launched ACT 2, and I'm sorry to confirm the verbose, sardonic, specifically Andrew Hussie-imitating narrator of ACT 1 (written by @​skullmandible) was replaced with the bog-standard point-and-click voice. Below are results for "use shoes on pet food" from ACT 1 and ACT 2.
"If you ever heard the Dawn Chorus of the local dragons, every morning at 4AM, you'd want your living quarters fifty feet beneath a mountain's surface, too. Now, if you're done letting in the evening alpine air…"
Maybe, you think, a clue to your missing memory is in this diary with your name on it. You open it, and the first page reads "First of all, you HATE diaries :p", which is also apparently the last page.
Your HP was maxed out. What? Healing? No, you weren't healed. Your HP and Max HP are equal now, that's all.
Long-a-thon does it again
Quick question about Dragon Quest canon: do they ever show the weeping giant from whose tear-shedding cheeks the Slimes come from, or is its existence just perpetually implied
"Maybe I want to cry. Maybe crying is healthy. Babies cry all the time and they're the healthiest you'll ever be in your life."
Hacked version of Choice Of The Dragon (web interactive fiction game) where at the end of the exhaustive character creation questions, the narrator is revealed to be a royal census-taker impersonating an interactive fiction game's UI, and there isn't actually any game afterward.
Name the only three objects more precious than a human soul. 1._________T-rex soul_______________ 2._"unlock all games" Steam key__ 3.____real life Penrose triangle_____
The very limited pool of emotions a human is capable of feeling while inside a warehouse
Classical music as the Elizabethans intended
John Ronald Reuel Playing Game Tolkien
Anodyne 2: Return to Dust (2019)
"Foosball is a holy sport… much as we move the players with the poles, so too does God move us – en masse, unseen… and much as the poles outnumber our hands, so too does human malevolence outpace God's grasp… The phantasmal chaos of Soccer is but a fantasy of the Godless…"
FENCELESS POST Its chain-link wire long lost, its powers are meagre. But still, it will ensure for all eternity that no matter where trespassers stand, there will always be an inch of ground fenced from them.
"The view from the spare room window was of a world of vivid plants and flowers that no door led to and no other window showed… and when viewed from the paved, rocky yard, behind the spare room window was an unreachable space filled with moss and creeping vines."
"The 'baby', as far as we know, was either the squat, primitive ancestor of pre-civilised humans, or their soft, docile descendant."
Decided to check on the record highest World Of Goo towers at http://goofans.com/leaderboard . (Most of these aren't actually stable because the game only tracks maximum attained height, not ongoing height.) Anyway, I find it a little funny how many are shaped like the letter A.
Issuing myself a Satisfaction Emotion because I deduced, without external assistance, that the way to clip CSS linear gradients, as one would use when constructing a videogame health bar, is to multiply their colour stops so that they extend beyond 100%.
98.6 degrees Gesundheit
Lategame spoilers: there's a serious horror-themed level, and its tiny plot is exactly the horror taste I love – namely, the antagonist is written in a sympathetic and foolish fashion. Even the first time it kills, it's loosely implied it did so to do the player a favour. Bless
Easily the biggest complaint I have about this game is the limited dust inventory space and the need to fill the prism to progress. Why is that in the game? The worst-case situation that results from this (having to grind for dust) feels so utterly pointless.
OK, this has gotten ridiculous. There are too many parodies of Dragon Quest style fantasy RPGs! We get it! It's predictable and morally simplistic! Stop doing wacky spoofs of it!! *camera whips around to reveal the controller I'm holding is actually A PRINT COPY OF DON QUIXOTE*
Anodyne 2 has a number of unlockable developer-commentary areas called "Unzones", many of which use the engine's default skybox and shape primitives, and I was REALLY hoping they were going to borrow a joke Oikospiel did, and refer to the totality of Unzones as "an Unity".
At last someone gets me
'dyne 2's protagonist's design (Nova) reminds me a lot of Xexyz's Apollo, another game which blended fantasy and science-fiction into something distinctly its own, and which featured a space-suited silent hero receiving orders from various nebulously-defined authorities.
People have probably concluded that this game is like Glittermitten Grove (for obvious reasons… and actually, that game REALLY would have been improved with an Anodyne 2-style framing story), but I most enjoyed this game when it reminded me of Oikospiel.
I'll say this about the game's shrinking-and-cleaning: I do appreciate that it's not quite legible as Fantastic Voyage-style medicine, it's not quite legible as cyberpunk hacking, and it's not quite legible as Psychonauts-style dream-entering, and is its own indivisible concept.
I played Anodyne 2… having been badly bored beyond belief by Anodyne 1, I was considerably unimpressed by this game's opening, though fortunately it managed to scrounge up some Leon-Attracting Storytelling Tricks to rope me back in at the nick of time.
At work inventing new and repulsive CSS text glitch effects that won't ever make it into a game because of how much CPU they chew up
Firefox bug detected: the information bubble and graying-out of this CSS property is actually incorrect, as text-overflow is used for <select> elements with a limited width, even without overflow:hidden.
Which is a shame because there's a lot of seeds and hints of greater depth – there's a subplot involving a school bully seeking redemption that ends up going barely anywhere – and there's a lot of good environment designs (WAY better than Anodyne 1).
Really the most disappointing part of this game is how predictable the plot turned out to be. The characters don't really have arcs, and with the exception of one chapter, the conflict progresses fairly linearly. This really has the plot of a AAA game.
So, like. Random philosophical question here. At what point does an Epic Gamer Reference stop being a reference and start being plagiarism
I just listened to the game's soundtrack… most of it is curated Creative Commons music, but it has a few original commissions. I think the best track is actually this battle music, even though the melody's pretty messy and its playful nature is wasted on very generic bosses.
New twitter feature, reaction image
Reading my tweets is now "Leonscrolling".
Lemme tell ya, just when you think you're at the end, it starts tossing dungeons at you like they're about to go rotten. "What? Dialogue? Story? No, you're filling out your skill trees and equips. Here's sackloads of currency, plus sackloads of a new currency I just invented."
If the lategame's gonna run this long, it'd BETTER have some tilesets of this calibre to go with it.
2020: Your hard drive, which is now the Internet, has a local copy of Homestuck, Kongregate, and a pile of exported data .zips from terminated social networks. The Internet, which is now your hard drive, is where all your apps and games are.
New programmers: don't be intimidated by the complexity of programming! Most programmers DO NOT have all four arithmetic operators memorised, and DO have to look up their meanings regularly.
Chroma has aged well as an allegory for the Internet circa 2000: excited at new modes of human communication, fearful of existing racial and sexual prejudices being simply reinvented across it, and, most importantly, ending abruptly with its plot unfinished, like a true webcomic.
Bad news: the inter-chapter navigation links inside these files crash the player when activated, so this isn't an ideal preservation of the work. Nevertheless each chapter in and of itself is complete, and remain fully responsive to mouse input.
Bad news: despite having a Shockwave player at its disposal, Flashpoint does NOT have a copy of Chroma (Erik Lawer, 2001), AND its original host is offline. Good news, for just me: I still have a copy of the offline PowerPC OS X build, containing the .dxr files for each chapter.
This game turned out to be much more of a straight dungeon-crawler than what I'd expected, which is a bit *types "unfortunate" and then backspaces all of it* disappointing. Also, the game really loves its own battle system… which is my way of saying "select easy difficulty".
This game has so much fifteen-foot-tall worldbuilding graffiti… Every wall has a different message.
Imagine every time you wanted to say something, your choice was presented in a menu alongside its exact opposite. Visual novel protagonists have to deal with this every minute of their lives and yet aren't debilitated by overwhelming self-doubt, which to me is just unrealistic.
Thinking about how optional bosses in A Dragon's ReQuest use this one over-the-top track. This isn't from MusMus, but from Shade0123's BGM Material Collection Vol. 1 (https://soundcloud.com/shade0123/shade-bgm-material-collection-volrpg-sample). Feels like the same energy as Barkley Gaiden abruptly using Blue Dragon's boss music.
Staring at this image from Fangamer's new merch push, and feeling like there's some obscure law of character design convergent evolution at work here.
Why don't they also make ELECTRIC FLOSS?? *leaps out of bed, writes "ELECTRIC FLOSS" on a scrap of paper, then falls back to sleep. Minutes later, a shadowy figure approaches the bedside, takes the paper, brushes my cheek tenderly while murmuring "At long last", then vanishes*
Today I'd like to give a hearty morning congratulations to all the anglerfish in Outer Wilds, who as of 9:AM 00, devoured their one millionth player who was trying to just get the goddamn ending already. You all really did it. You really, really did do that.
Hey. So. Random question. More of an observation, really. But, um. Just wondering. Why is the SPC music rip of Chrono Trigger's five-second "time vortex" cutscene over four minutes long
People who write all their tweets and DMs with proper capitalisation are the modern-day equivalent of fantasy characters that never use contractions.
One final note: the game comes with a file listing various "Content Warnings" for the story. I've crossed out all the entries I'm convinced are jokes (or listed insincerely) and added my own (opinionated) remarks about ones which I believe are slightly or strongly misleading.
I got the true ending! I love this crappy game! 7 out of 10!! The magic rating! Also there's like 15 endings and the multiple conditions for the true ending were only outlined in the changelog.txt for some reason!!!
My current uninformed speculation is that the creator is a well-meaning fellow who would nonetheless take five seconds to recall what the last two letters of LGBT stand for. That said, I have played zero of his other four games, so who knows what I could extrapolate from those.
In the game itself, only a few sore thumbs stick out: the main character at one point describes her sexuality (lesbian) as "being allergic to wieners". Also not a good sign, and one which also produces a few mercifully brief jokes about "hermaphroditic" shapeshifting dragonfolk.
It's been hard for me to squint at what this Saintbomber guy's politics is, since his only social media presence is one Patreon and one abandoned dA from 2012. The game's credits thank 4chan's yuri board (/u/) for playtesting… which I don't consider an especially good sign.
Importantly, most of the relevant tracks are from the Jazz section rather than just the Cool and RPG-style sections, lending this game less of the usual tiresome JRPG bombast and more of the playful tone befitting this game's polycule of jokers.
You might've noticed by now, but all of the music (minus a few generously donated tracks) is from the MusMus royalty free soundtrack library https://musmus.main.jp/english.html (also known to aficionados as "the REAL default RPG Maker and RenPy music").
After you clear each dungeon, the game's villain adds mandatory encounters to the overworld, explained via this – how would you uncouth Americans put this – "PC98-ass cutscene". Ironically, this is an EXTREMELY good way of reminding you who the otherwise very distant villain is.
Another warning: it's obvious that this is a "got sick of making the game" release rather than a "final" version. Typos are noticeable, a few cutscene splashes use placeholder or sketch art, a few NPCs have "TODO" dialogue, as well as the aforementioned lategame balance issues.
As for the mechanics: the random encounter rate is refreshingly low, and most of the combat is pretty balanced, though in lategame the ability to purchase level-up potions, plus a few overpowered hidden spells, lets you brutally hammer the difficulty curve into a sheet.
Word of warning: this game's plot hinges on a LOT of character family tree references. One should strongly consider making a diagram on paper if you want to understand what they're talking about as the game goes late. It's a goddamn Wizardry dungeon of genealogy here.
The meat of the game is really the interstitial inter-party dialogue. This clip essentially represents what it's like to play it. The dialogue maintains this exact volume, tone, and back-and-forth throughout. The door in this clip isn't even plot-relevant for God's sake.
Additionally, most of the game's monsters and bosses are monster women who are frequently topless, though their designs are not – shall I say – as overtly sexualised as more explicitly pornographic works.
Regarding the game's R-18 content: this RPG stars several mid-20s cis noblewomen with long sexual pasts with each other, and have onscreen sex (with each other) about once every 90 minutes of play time, and spend the rest being handsy and giving each other access to their bodies.
Due to a miscalculation on my part, I am playing the RPG Maker default assets game A Dragon's ReQuest (https://www.patreon.com/posts/large-battleship-42908520). This game by Saintbomber (the Embric Of Wulfhammer maker) was a Dragon Quest spoof for the first hour of development, though only faint traces remain.
"Well, I've caught up on my timeline. And now, having read the posts of the past, it's time to write the posts of the future." – common saying of Internet posters
When conversing with friends, one should avoid playing along with the various "bits" they do on social media, as if that's all they are. You should see past the Personal Brand they sell to the public, and converse with a truer self: the Interpersonal Brand they sell to friends.
"Time to start on the world map for my alt-history setting." *draws a compass with directions marked "North", "Down", "Left" and "East"*
The MTG corp periodically making "new" Lotus cards is hilarious to me because the original, apart from being banned, isn't even fun to play with. It's like if each new Mario Kart added different blue shells to the roster, and proudly advertised each blue shell's new features.
Just been catching up on the normal, optimistic things people are saying about the latest Magic: The Gathering set (source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hRcpRl4R6Fc)
Just spent 30 extremely wild seconds pondering on a hypothetical "anti-Harvester", a game whose constructed world is designed to indoctrinate a serial killer into peace, then realised with a tidal wave of disgust that I'd just described End Roll.
Mother 3 even has a final "Black Lodge" dungeon in the vein of Harvester's, consisting of a seemingly endless gauntlet of dreamlike, thematically dissonant rooms, gradually indoctrinating the protagonists in the belief system of the antagonist, ultimately asking them to love him.
What I find interesting are its similarities with Mother 3… The latter features an encroachment of capitalism (again invoking "idyllic" 50s suburbia), and the corruption of the natural world, culminating in a completely fake metropolis dedicated only to worshipping the Pig King.
This environment forces the protagonist to become increasingly accepting of all of these forms of violence, ramping up to the final scene where he willingly performs a literal, actual Mortal Kombat fatality on a begging woman.
Harvester's main point (often obscured by its misguided marketing) is satirising the "inherent" violence of videogames, by presenting a world set in an "idyllic" pre-videogame era (the 50's) suffused with normalised forms of violence: colonial, military, institutional, sexual.
I remember in the back half of the 00's that Mother 3 was touted as "the closest videogames have come to literature" but this game feels identically aspiring to allegorical literature exactly a decade earlier. (Not to say that it's good. Both games have comparable failings.)
I spent the past week watching a playthrough of Harvester (1996 point-and-click horror satire) and I'm honestly taken aback that a game this ambitious in social commentary even came out in the 90's, the least self-aware decade, and in the West, the least self-aware culture.
The swan, well-known for being the final boss of Saint-Saëns's "Carnival of the Animals",
In retrospect Zelda 1 should have just used Ravel's Bolero as its main theme, because all the games are just the same predictable pattern over and over. OOOOOOOHHH *I tumble over and it becomes clear I was actually hooting due to a sudden coincidental foot cramp*
Today I learned that with Greenshot (https://getgreenshot.org) you can create AND capture multiple screenshot magnifier bubbles by simply tapping the screenshot hotkey multiple times.
NOT EVEN ONE YEAR LATER!! I believe I don't need to express exactly how negative my emotions are right now. https://twitter.com/evegwood/status/1323731659301277696
99. "No! You can't stick a fork in me here! I only learned how to cook mac and cheese!" 100. "This battle is being recorded for training purposes. Potty-training, that is! ...Y-you're all babies."
97. "By the Blessed Pollen of the Vast Spring Bloom, HEAL ME YOU TURDS!" 98. "Always bring sharp pencils to a final exam!"
93. "Half the matter in my bodysuit isn't in the Periodic Table yet." 94. "Whatever author is writing my life: stop making the enemy so hot!!" 95. "Armour strong. Helmet strong. Sword strong. Enemy... stronger." 96. "My sectors are corrupted! Email me a patch, quick!"
90. "My connection to Command is dead... so it's time to use the classified mech weapons!" 91. "Human minds are so soft and pliable! It grosses me out!" 92. "No psychic tricks or wizardly conjuring can beat the sheer might of being 6 foot 1."
87. "My ultimate may be ready... but are the lights and the cameras?" 88. "These wings will carry me to the edge of victory! These arms will slowly lift me up to it!" 89. "No prism can refract the colour brown. Mud will always swallow the light!"
84. "Call me any name. But, if you call me late for dinner... I shall be most displeased indeed." 85. "Every crack you carve in my body will be covered by moss by century's end." 86. "Take my phone! My number ends in 58008! I want you to have it!!"
81. "Time for a true show of ventriloquist skill. My dummy... has a DIFFERENT VOICE-ACTOR!" 82. "Spin cycle! Full-strength powder! The stains of my shame will be washed away today!" 83. "While you're healing me, can you fix my makeup? Just kidding... I'm all natural."
77. "The strongest Light comes from searing Flame. You want Her, you get Me too." 78. "BOOM! Two pair! The double katanas of Poker hands." 79. "Vertical paper... Only a coward uses that throw." 80. "My blade was forged in a volcano and cooled in the deepest of peat bogs."
74. "The Earth is dying beneath us! I can barely channel mana for my necromantic spells!" 75. "Your bullets hit only my self-preservation chips!" 76. "I am done weeping. Now to fight with utter calmness and rationality!"
71. "The humble spear: Heavy, long, and slow, like all the coolest swords." 72. "Being psychokinetic, even an arrow can become a deadly weapon in my grasp." 73. "There's no Dewey Decimal Number for an event like this!"
68. "I appreciate the healing, but I expect my personal physician shall scowl at your handiwork." 69. "I'm like a frog. It's impossible to boil me." 70. "Push me over, and I'll use martial arts to switch places so YOU fell over instead."
65. "My inventory is full. I can't take any L's today." 66. "Only a fellow master of the rules of Backgammon can hope to match wits with me." 67. "By Mother Nature's blessing, let me delete the hostile processes from the sector!"
61. "I've been sliced up like ribbons so often, I figured I'd wear 'em!" 62. "Being a robot, I can't feel gratitude for healing me. Go to hell." 63. "Rise, vengeful dead! N-not if you're vengeful at me, though." 64. "The black wind blows... That NEVER happens this time of year."
58. "The animals aren't my servants. They merely owe me a few gambling debts." 59. "My body is an obstacle to my will. Rocket-jumps let me surpass it." 60. "Mr. Bear, the enemy is scary! 'Grr, stop doing ventriloquism in battle! Grr!' Sorry!"
54. "My ultimate was always ready. I see now it is I who was not." 55. "Forget SOS, I need SMS! Save MY Soul, damnit!" 56. "It WAS an honour to serve. Now it's just for survival." 57. "Fight fire! I don't care what with, just fight it!"
50. "Balance the books, balance the soul." 51. "Wish they'd issue us healzookas... Or just invent them." 52. "I'm the spider, you're the fly. Your words bounce off me and stick to you." 53. "Ha! You stabbed into a wound I already just got!"
46. "My ultimate ability is not even CLO- wait nevermind it's here." 47. "I am a scion of the Void, human. Healing me doesn't make us friends." 48. "In close-quarters combat, I offer no quarter." 49. "My only peers are the ones I eat in fruit salad!"
41. "I'm like caltrops. I always land right-side-up." 42. "Don't be scared! Stress ruins the brain's taste!" 43. "Remember, add acid to water... if you're a WIMP!" 44. "I only need one arrow. Let's find out which one." 45. "If I die, I die. If you die... YOOOOOOU die. ;-D"
37. "I'll devour your memories... and have your body for dessert!" 38. "My ultimate ability is not even CLOSE to bein' ready yet!" 39. "There's no wall I can't outsmart, and no pit I can't outmuscle." 40. "WHEW! Another battle successfully just begun."
33. "Thanks for reviving me. I might bleed to death twice today." 34. "Every inch of my beard is a year of arcane study!" 35. "It seems I rocked when I should've scissored." 36. "Blood is just muddy water. Let me return it to the ocean."
29. "Someone check my ultimate's meter! I think I heard it ding!" 30. "Meet my left arm. Only part of me that ain't utterly dominant." 31. "Need a good tailor? I need a good pincushion." 32. "You'd be a perfect test subject. Pity I lost my tenure!"
25. "Cover me! I need to wash off this blood before it dries!" 26. "Health kits to my left! The same health kits are now to my right!" 27. "No! I keep my spare test tubes in that pant leg!" 28. "Thanks for the healing! Now off to undo all your work!"
21. "10 Print Hello World? More like 10 Billion Zillion Print Hello UNIVERSE!!" 22. "As the cosmos moves in a circle, so too do I strafe." 23. "I'm a gamer, so I THINK I know how to kill a grown man, guys." 24. "We need backup! Preferably in front of us!"
17. "A sword is just a tool. A sword plus Extend-O-Arms is one HELLUVA tool." 18. "Hit me, dealer. I've got x-ray vision, so I can see your cards' bones." 19. "The way I see it, all o' THEM defected from MY side." 20. "I've hit homers off pitchers with tighter pants than you."
13. "The only blade worth wielding is the rollerblade!" 14. "Rudimentary physics: Force equals mass TIMES ANGER!" 15. "Behold my huge brain! My huge, soft, jiggly brain!" 16. "Can you keep up with my dance moves? Nevermind – this part's my solo."
8. "Even a mere twig can give a tender foot major ouchie-wouchies." 9. "By my hatbands! What in the Celestial Brim is this?" 10. "We are all so beautiful beneath all this skin and flesh." 11. "Only another cyber-assassin can best me!" 12. "Activating STEAAAAAALTH MOOOOOODE!!"
4. "Actions are pure. Words are deceptive. Especially "masticate"." 5. "Should my sword break, I guess I'll poke around out back for another one." 6. "Stand and fight! Hover and fight is good too." 7. "I'm starting to think them rotters can respawn too."
LEON ENTERPRISES LLC PRESENTS: 100 BAD VIDEOGAME BARKS 1. "Just gimme a sword and a leather suitcase to carry it in." 2. "I escaped from the Mortuary! I'm wanted dead or not alive!" 3. "If you don't lick your guns clean, do you really love 'em?"
"It's not gambling if you cheat. Unless you're bad at not getting caught. Then, heh, it's a different kind of gambling."
Familiar with the general idea of rain but reticent to waste so much water on something as commonplace as a weather phenomenon, it instead generated a thick cloud of raindrops, each hovering, motionless, at arbitrary points in the air.
"We don't exploit natural resources. We give it purpose. You think coal could get a job just lying in the ground? You think beef had a career inside a cow? You think cobalt became world famous because of its own artistic brilliance? Huh?"
A team of toriningens picking up Madotsuki, placing her inside a guard-railed mall circle garden filled only with bark chips, and leaving her there.
A note about playing: you switch between the four characters constantly in both games, and each character has steadily increasing loads of emotional baggage that you switch into as well, so I recommend playing both games start-to-finish in one sitting to keep it all in your head.
Danger – Danger – People are now describing Studio Ghibli movies with the phrase "BotW Aesthetic" – Proceed With Caution
Good ending! The final chapter's split-party battle is particularly good at always having another plot twist to deploy just before you switch viewpoints, such that you paradoxically always feel like you need to hurry up to get back to the "real story" every time.
This game having the same kind of "dialogue tree song" as in Kentucky Route Zero, complete with voiced lyrics, in the same chapter number (3), is oddly comforting, like I'm seeing a game subgenre be slowly born.
OK, listen. This tweet is important. Remember the guitar minigames from Night In The Woods? Remember the shame and frustration they were designed to callously elicit? What we've got in this game is a loud, screaming parody of that exact experience.
Cinematic parallels
I will say that the new combat sprites being very specifically Lucah-inspired, to the point of commissioning animations from one of Lucah's devs, is a very powerful move for this series.
Continuing this thread with Meatpunks 2 (https://hthr.itch.io/extreme-meatpunks-forever-2). The backlog is a bit limited at 4 boxes deep (especially given how often quick quips and tics pepper the script) but works sufficiently for jokes like these.
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