Leon's Microblog – May 2022

Legacy Of Lunatic Kingdom (2015)
"I hate to be negative, but this "infinite light" thing in your worldbuilding feels too zany. Light constantly comes from the sky? Hello, thermodynamics? Oh, right, it's not technically infinite, it's from this huge light dispenser that's 100 times bigger than the world. Sure."
The best metric for determining the quality of an anime about high-scoolers is how ridiculous the school building looks. If the showrunner makes the school building preposterous, they're near the top of their game. This is how you can tell Utena and Eizouken are high tier.
"What? More customers if the truck had any signage at all? Buddy, that's why we're called "The Cold Open"! You come up to the side, you order, then–" *switches on a backlit sign and a tinny musical chime* "THE LATE TITLE DROP! We're a high-concept ice-cream truck, don'tchaknow."
Hakurei ~ Eastern Wind sounds so much better and more emotional in the 1999 MIDI version than the FM synth version. It's remarkable.
I want to play a Soulslike Touhou game, and the explanation for why it's a Soulslike at all is that you are a fairy (who all canonically respawn) and the characters you meet want to get more P items.
Celebrating my latest Dark Souls 1 win by finally watching the 2013 GDQ run
I'm well aware that this game has a crafting system, and I wish that crafting system the best of luck.
*notices that the icon for Intelligence is a candle* Hmm… That looks like something that might make for a tepidly amusing reference of some kind or another.
Well, finished my second Dark Souls run ever… using the same class as the first run because I already knew where all the good stuff for it was. First run's final stats (left) vs second run's final stats (right).
In Mystic Square, Yuuka was the super-wide-spread-attack archetype, and was by far the worst shot in the game. 19 years later, ZUN, having learnt well from the past, proceeded to give that exact same archetype to Cirno.
Damn… someone remixed THAT beloved Touhou track from Embodiment Of Scarlet Devil… in SPC?!?!
https://www.smwcentral.net/?p=section&a=details&id=11975 – This is from "the Vanilla Level Design Contest compilation ROM", and this track is for the map screen with the worst-scoring levels. The very concept horribly amuses me.
https://gilvasunner.bandcamp.com/track/song-that-might-play-when-you-jump-into-the-beatrice-portrait – This is one of the worst pieces of music ever created, but I'm posting it for A) the name, and B) that it continues Umineko's meta-joke of this melody getting progressively worse renditions in subsequent episodes. [Super Mario 64, Umineko When They Cry]
I think an often-overlooked negative turn for UI in the 10's was when advisory dialog boxes started having their own advertising slogans, essentially trying to market their message instead of just saying it. Everything has to look like an ad now. Every feature is a product.
People keep going on about tomatoes, but on the fruit-vegetable spectrum, pumpkins are like a 6. Sweet potatoes are a 7.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y2uIOxd3ees – OK, I'll admit, I read the description for this one and thought "There's no way this could possibly be good"… but it managed to be precisely focused enough to sound decent. [Mother 3, Deltarune]
I'm not going to link this one or put it in the thread, but reading this description made me have a physical reaction.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q2mI65qn0To – This one's almost good, but I /think/ it's cheating by adding more instruments, so I'm giving it a bit of a side-eye. [Deltarune, Cave Story]
I'm getting a little sick of the semantic shift of the word "cursed" to meaning "mildly kitsch". I hope that it will eventually re-center on its valuable original meaning of "an item that welds itself to your hand in a queasy metal-to-flesh fusion whenever you equip it".
I've accepted that some day I will eventually hear a politician say "protip", as one word, in a press conference, and am simply hoping that I can make the most of my time before that moment.
*starts writing a "Touhou spell card names are isomorphic with C64 exploration game room names" tweet, thus causing the word "isomorphic" to finally collapse under the strain*
Hmm, guess I should finally check out some recent Increpare games. *goes to https://increpare.com/game/eyeball-watching-flowers-bloom.html and then takes 10 arduous minutes to clear the first level* Well, I'm all tuckered out for today.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UzjRRATCQ0g – OK, this one is pretty clever, but, like, the way this replaces a frantic minor-key melody with a slightly slower major-key one just feels off to me. [Kirby's Dream Land 3, Undertale]
Mother 3 had to be delayed as much as it was because if it had released on the N64, it would've been an Earthbound-inspired RPG and a low-poly PS1-style horror game at the same time. It would've been chaos.
This is almost certainly a reference to a fact that one of the rooms in the 1995 demo that does play the slide music in the final game did not back then, but its absence does tonally distinguish this hack by a good amount.
I think one of the funnier and less appreciated aspects of B3313 is that the peppy slide-level harmonica music is completely expunged from the game. Not a single room plays it.
Finally managed to find some authentic Izumi Takemoto comics, and I'm already loving the fact that basically all of ZUN's anatomy, from facial structure to eye shape to head-body ratio, is pretty much entirely inherited from this mangaka, even to this day. Mwah! Delicious.
What this means is that a query language (CSS selectors) designed exclusively to operate on only one type of node (elements) for one particular purpose (rendering) is not quite good enough as a general-purpose tree traversal language.
Time for another "You Are SpamZapper 3.1" (the text adventure game I made 7 months ago) exclusive developer interview!! Q: Did you steal that whole duck thing from that Little Nuns webcomic? A: No!!! I stole it from The Far Side. And that's it! Scintillating insights as always!
Well, time to settle down and play some Omori
https://modarchive.org/index.php?request=view_player&query=115289 – I knew this one was going to be a winner in the first 2 seconds.
"Listen. I will be back. I promise. But if I don't…" They hand you a slip of paper. "…this is all I want you to do. Farewell." After they depart into the darkness, you open the paper. It simply reads "say my cause of death was 'homemade teleporter accident'".
"Oh boy I love programming. I wish I could do it every day for the reeeest of my liiiife" *fixes a one-letter typo in one comment* "Another Successful Procedure" *types "git commit -m 'Augment clarity of method description'" then falls dead asleep before reaching the Enter key*
Just spent several hours successfully migrating my Mac OS stuff from SheepShaver to QEmu, only to finally sit back and enumerate things and realise that QEmu does three things better and three things much worse. '~'
It was offered until when
"Average Touhou character eats 8 dragon kings per year" actually just statistical error. Momoyo Himemushi, who lives in a cave and
https://gilvasunner.bandcamp.com/track/lost-colored-woods-2 – Not half bad, but I think it would've been a bit cleverer if this had been listed as the Majora's Mask "version" of this song, for reasons which I hope are obvious. [Ocarina Of Time, Story Of Eastern Wonderland]
"I UNIRONICALLY LOVE SOFTWARE" – me, after finding out that there's a disk image format called "qcow2" that I have to deal with for the next several hours
I want Dark Souls to have "grazing", which does nothing except make the Deltarune heart outline appear over you whenever you have "a close one", thus confirming that you're playing the game correctly.
"This next one is called Orin 5 Skip. It's called that because you skip Orin 5."
Despite only having medium affection for Dark Souls 1, I have nonetheless become "that piece o' crap" who insists on PTDE because Remastered isn't "authentic" enough, but still uses DSFix to get 60FPS anyway even though it means certain slopes can no longer be walked up.
Yeah, you think that's impressive? I heard Necrofantasia only uses the gaps between the keys, and it sounds like that because the player ultimately ends up hitting both.
Just learned that "Gwyn's theme in Dark Souls only uses the white keys on the keyboard because he's the lord of light", which to me feels like the primordial, Platonic ideal expressed by the word "factoid".
https://gilvasunner.bandcamp.com/track/the-legendary-alchemy-lab – Another clever old favourite I'd completely forgot about. [Kirby: Squeak Squad, Castlevania: Symphony of the Night]
https://gilvasunner.bandcamp.com/track/gravity-revolving – This one's decent, but a few suboptimal arrangement choices here and there put it down a notch. [Cave Story, Deltarune]
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